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GOD'S CALL
Major themes in the Scriptures
The wisdom of God (2)
Wisdom in the cross
Reference: GDC-S19-002-Mw-R00-P2
(Originally spoken on 14 December 2014, edited on 17 December 2014)
Web site: http://www.ajourneyinlife.org and http://www.ajourneyinlife.com
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The Lord willing, today we will consider the subject, "The wisdom of God", the second message, in seeking to appreciate major themes in the Scriptures.
A short summary of today's message:
God is perfectly good and infinitely wise, yet His wisdom is often not appreciated because our values and goals are often very different from what is in His heart and what He wants to accomplish. This is especially seen in His wisdom in the cross.
We will seek the Lord to appreciate more of what this means.
We all know that the cross is at the very heart of how God has dealt with mankind in His love.
It is something very deep, difficult to properly appreciate. Over the years, as I ponder over this, as I read the Scriptures, I am deeply amazed that such an event could ever take place. It is almost unbelievable; it is unimaginable that God, the Creator of all things, the almighty, all-powerful God, could consider a plan such as the cross.
We can say that the cross came about because of the need for man's forgiveness. It came about because of the issue of sin and so from one angle, we can say that God was very wise in the way He dealt with the problem of sin.
God had to deal with sin because He is a perfect and just God. And yet, knowing that all men have sinned, the only outcome would be that all mankind would perish, suffer the judgment of God.
How could God save us?
We can say that in His wisdom, He found a plan by which He could take our place and suffer for us and therefore forgive us, set us free. We can say that that is a wise plan.
But let us go further and consider: What kind of wisdom is this? Can we imagine the almighty God who created all things, who has all the power in the world choosing a plan such as the cross, which required Him to suffer the greatest suffering ever imaginable?
It is impossible for us to conceive that: how God suffered in order to execute the plan. We can say the plan is wise but this wisdom is not just the wisdom of an idea, of something that can be done; it is a wisdom carried out because of the love of God, the holiness of God, the compassion of God.
It is this this kind of wisdom that we need to appreciate in God; not just that He is very capable, He can think of many good things to do, but He has actually gone through it in reality.
I do hope that increasingly, we will appreciate more and more of what this means: the wisdom of God of a nature, of a kind that if we truly understand and are grateful to Him, we will just bow down and worship; we will want to live for Him; we would not want to stray from Him; all other things would become unimportant.
We do not properly appreciate what this means in terms of its implications to our lives.
Yes, we thank God - He is kind to us, He has helped us, we are appreciative of His forgiveness, of all that the Lord Jesus Christ has made available to us.
But have we understood what it cost Him, what it meant to Him, why He did it this way, and what it should mean to us in our response to Him?
Of all the things that men may have considered as to why they believe in God, why they believe in the Lord Jesus Christ; to me, the greatest evidence, the greatest issue that has helped me to appreciate the reality of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ is the cross: The cross is not something that men can imagine; men can think about, conjure up and write a fiction about it. The cross is not something that men would be able to think about, and as we ponder over its meaning, we can see that it can only come from a perfectly wise and perfectly good God.
So let us always remember that the wisdom of God must always be understood in the context of His moral perfection, His holiness, His love, His kindness, His mercy, His grace.
Let us look at how the apostle Paul put it in 1 Corinthians 1: 17-25:
1 Corinthians 1: 17-25
- For Christ did not send me to baptize, but to preach the gospel, not in cleverness of speech, so that the cross of Christ would not be made void.
- For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.
- For it is written, "I WILL DESTROY THE WISDOM OF THE WISE, AND THE CLEVERNESS OF THE CLEVER I WILL SET ASIDE."
- Where is the wise man? Where is the scribe? Where is the debater of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world?
- For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not come to know God, God was well-pleased through the foolishness of the message preached to save those who believe.
- For indeed Jews ask for signs and Greeks search for wisdom;
- but we preach Christ crucified, to Jews a stumbling block and to Gentiles foolishness,
- but to those who are the called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God.
- Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men.
Here, the apostle Paul brings across strongly the issue of wisdom: wisdom from the world or wisdom of God; and in that context, he speaks of weakness and power. They are very closely associated and it helps us understand what ought to be our approach to life.
The apostle Paul said, "For Christ did not send me to baptize, but to preach the gospel, not in cleverness of speech, so that the cross of Christ would not be made void." He specifically says that if we were to preach the gospel in cleverness of speech, we will make the cross of Christ void.
Why is that so? Is it not good to present the gospel in a way that is attractive to men, a clever way of communicating the gospel that would attract the attention of people, that will melt their hearts, that will draw them to respond to God?
But the apostle Paul says, "If we are to speak with cleverness of speech, we will make the cross of Christ void - it becomes ineffective. Why is that so?
He then explains, "For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God." As far as the people are concerned, who are not responsive to God's moral perfection, the word of the cross is foolishness. If we were to make the word of the cross cleverness of speech, many people may receive it, may respond but they will not be responding to God.
There are many people who want to make it easier for people to become Christians; they make it attractive, persuasive, but they leave out the central aspects of the message of the gospel.
The central message of the gospel deals with sin: If we do not deal with the issue of sin deeply enough, there is no message that we can bring to the people.
What are we saving people from? We want people to go to heaven. How can that be? Is it just by saying, "I accept Christ as my Saviour"? Just by saying such words cannot entitle us to enter heaven.
The issue of sin has to be addressed. There must be genuine repentance; there must be a genuine turning to God, the heart must change.
John the Baptist preached as a forerunner of Christ to prepare people for the coming of Christ. What was his message? Basically, summed up in one word, "Repent!": that was the message of John the Baptist.
If we are to help people to come to the Lord Jesus Christ, then the issue of sin has to be properly addressed. People do not like to face this issue because people in general want their own way. They want what they like; they are attracted by the things of this world, they do not wish to give that up.
But they would like to go to heaven; they would like to experience the power of God; they would like to know the peace that can come in the midst of trouble; they would like to be able to pray and see God answer prayers.
But they may not be prepared to give up the self-life, to give up the things of the world, to turn away from a life that is in rebellion against God.
So the message of the cross would be foolishness to such people. To them, God should not respond to us in this way. Why is it they may regard this as foolishness?
The apostle Paul says, "For indeed Jews ask for signs and Greeks search for wisdom..." People in the world who are not responsive to God have their way of considering what life ought to be.
Jews ask for signs: what were they looking for? They wanted to see the Lord Jesus perform signs. Why?
When we see in the Scriptures how the Jews approached the Lord Jesus Christ, we can see one of the areas that was very important to them was power. They wanted the Lord Jesus to be king in the physical realm, to lead them because the Lord Jesus had power, He could perform miracles. They wanted to force Him to become king; the Lord Jesus went away.
The Jews wanted a Saviour who could deliver them from their suffering and bondage, difficult times that they were going through. They were a conquered nation; they wanted deliverance.
Perhaps they would have recalled how Moses delivered the people of Israel from Egypt, from Pharaoh.
They wanted the Lord Jesus Christ who was the Prophet after the likeness of Moses to do the same, to deliver them: Moses brought them out from Egypt by great signs and power, by the power of God.
But we preach Christ crucified - what power is that? The Lord Jesus Christ was totally weak in the eyes of the world. He had no power to deliver Himself from being crucified. They told Him: "Come down from the cross and we will believe you" but precisely He could not come down from the cross if He were to save them.
That is the wisdom of God in a manner that is unimaginable: it is foolishness to the world.
The Greeks search for wisdom: clever ways of answering questions, dealing with problems of life; philosophy. They argue for hours and days over many issues of life - what is the wise way of dealing with problems - but many of these issues may not have practical relevance; there can be many interesting ideas to talk about.
The apostle Paul then says, "The cross... Christ crucified is to the Jews a stumbling block and to Gentiles foolishness". Why is it to the Jews it was a stumbling block?
The Jews were seeking for signs; they wanted someone of power but the Lord Jesus was crucified. That was a stumbling block to them. How can a Saviour be crucified? The Christ, the Deliverer, the Saviour of the world - how could He be crucified? That was a stumbling block to them.
To the Gentiles, it was foolishness: How can the Creator of all things die on the cross for mankind? It is something that can never take place. To them, it is a foolish idea. There is no God who would ever do a thing like that; that is not something that can ever happen. It is foolishness.
But then he says, "...but to those who are the called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God." Christ crucified is the power of God. If Christ were not crucified, there would be no power to deliver us, to save us. But to the Jews, that was a stumbling block: Christ must be the King of kings and Lord of lords now, to deliver them.
"...to those who are the called... Christ... the wisdom of God". To the Gentiles, to the Greeks, it would seem very foolish but underlying that so-called "foolishness" is a wisdom that is very hard to appreciate: how can it be?
Anyone who seeks to understand wisdom would think: What would be a wise way for the Creator of the universe to deal with the problem of sin without having to suffer? Wisdom must include that. Why should He suffer? There is no need for Him to suffer. He is almighty, He is the Creator of all things; He can do whatever He wants. Why should He choose a course of action where not only did He suffer, but He suffered so intensely, so greatly, so deeply. Why is that necessary? Are there not other ways of dealing with this problem?
For example, why must God provide the cross?
We say without the cross, there is no salvation.
Yes, that is true, but look at the angels: God did not provide salvation for the angels. God created the angels and when they sinned, there was judgment. The angels who sinned became evil spirits and they are awaiting judgment. The sentence is passed: they will be judged; it is just a matter of time when it will be executed.
When the Lord Jesus Christ died on the cross, He did not die for the sins of angels. He died for the sins of mankind. So the angels who sinned have no hope of redemption.
Could God not do the same in His creation of mankind: all who sin will perish; only those who do not sin will be able to be with God? The angels who did not sin remained with God and they serve Him until today. So why could God not do it that way? If He were to do it that way, He would not have to suffer. Would not that be a wiser course of action?
But then we may say all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. So if there were no cross, all mankind would perish; there would be no survivor, there would be no one to continue to worship God and to be with God.
Why is there a difference between angels and men?
We know that God in His wisdom created man differently from angels because His purpose is different.
When God created man, He wanted man to develop the highest possible quality of moral meaning in his character. In order for man to develop the highest quality possible, he must be subjected to sufficient difficulties and tests and problems that will help him to make his choice in the right direction or the wrong direction. The quality of his response will be severely tested.
And this is what happened in the Garden of Eden and subsequent to that after man failed.
Adam and Eve were tempted by Satan, the most powerful cruel being. It was very difficult for them. They could have rejected but it was very difficult: So too for all the rest of us. We also can reject sin, the temptation to sin, but it is very difficult, as a result of which all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
The angels were in a different situation. They did not have a body like ours, they lived in the context of the presence of God; and in the midst of the presence of God, the holiness of God, it would be easier for them not to sin.
The same principle will apply when we go to heaven. When we are in heaven, our context will be very different; it will be much easier not to sin. But now we are on earth in this body; it is very easy to sin.
So then, we may say if that is the case, why not create us without this kind of body? Then there will be those who would not sin; then there will be no need for the cross. Would not that be a wise course of action?
Yes, it would be if God were not this perfect God that we know, because if He were to create man such that the difficulties are much less, then there may be those who do not sin and there is no need for God to provide the cross and He need not suffer.
But God is not satisfied with that. God is not satisfied to provide a context where man can develop to a certain extent but the scope is quite limited. God's intention is to provide a context where man can develop to the highest quality, to be like God: perfect as He is perfect; holy as He is holy; pure in heart, in a deep fellowship with Him.
Yes, we can never be perfect in the same way as God is perfect but we can be perfect in the context of our finiteness as created beings. If we learn to give up ourselves to Him, if we learn to receive His life, if we learn to live by His power, if Christ is formed in us, we can live lives that are like that of the holiness of God.
This is what God wants to bring about and because He wants to bring this about, the cross becomes necessary because all will sin and He needs to provide a way for man to be saved.
So before God created man, He already knew this. He knew that man would sin; He knew that the only way to make it possible for man to develop to be like God is to provide a means for forgiveness, to provide the life and power that comes through the cross to help us, so that we can overcome sin, develop righteousness, purity of heart of the highest quality. God understood all this before He created us and the most amazing thing is that having known that, He chose it.
It is something I marvel at over and over again all these years.
How could God choose such a course of action? God knew that if He were to create man in this kind of way then He Himself would have to suffer the greatest suffering ever possible.
We do not properly appreciate this and this affects the quality of our love for God; it affects us in terms of our preoccupation with the things of this world and the desire of the self-life. We do not understand what God has created us for, the potential in us that He wants to develop. If we could see this more deeply, it can help us to be motivated to move in that direction.
So God knew that it was necessary for Him to provide the cross.
Some may say even if all have sinned, it is not necessary to provide the cross. After all, God is the Creator of all things. He is omnipotent; He can do whatever He wants to do. If He wants to, He can simply say, "Yes, you have sinned. I forgive you."
Could He not do that? Could God not just say, "I forgive all your sins"? Then He would not need to die on the cross. So, to the world it is foolishness that God must suffer in that way. He could just say, "I forgive".
But then if God were to do that, He can no longer be the Judge. How is He going to judge some and forgive others? How is He going to judge the evil spirits and forgive us?
Those who are being judged will say, "It is not fair. We sin, we are suffering for our sins; we are being punished. They sin, You forgive them and they do not need to suffer."
Well, you may say because we repented, so God forgave us. But repentance does not qualify us for forgiveness. That is something that many of us may not quite appreciate.
There are many people who do things that are wrong and they say, "I am sorry" and when they say, "I am sorry", it means you must forgive. "I have said, 'I am sorry', so you must forgive." So being sorry entitles us to forgiveness. But that is not true.
When God forgives us, it is grace; it is not our entitlement.
Justice demands that sin be punished. We must suffer for our sins; we cannot just cancel it off.
So the only way by which God could properly deal with sin is for sin to be punished.
So if He were to punish us for our sins, all of us would suffer eternal punishment and that is why the only way that God could properly save us is to take the punishment Himself.
But God could not take the punishment as He was. He had to first identify with us. He had to become a man so that He could go through the temptations that we face, He could overcome all temptations and then offer Himself in our place as the sinless, perfect Man on behalf of sinful mankind.
A sinful man cannot take the place of another sinful man for punishment, but the Lord Jesus was sinless. He came into this world in a body like ours, tempted in every way like us but overcoming every temptation by the power of God, by the life of God; and having overcome all temptations, He offered Himself as a sacrifice on the cross for the sins of all mankind.
But that does not mean that because He died on the cross for us, all of us will be forgiven. That would not make sense either: He suffered and just because He suffered, all are forgiven.
The only way by which we can be forgiven is when we are identified with Him, we become joined to Him. That is why we can be united with Him in death and in resurrection. We must be identified with Him in order to be forgiven and that is why repentance is essential. While repentance does not entitle us to forgiveness, repentance is essential for forgiveness.
When we are truly repentant and we come to the Lord, acknowledge our sins that we deserve His judgment, we call upon Him for His mercy then the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ can be applied to us. It is grace that saves us; it is not justice that saved us. Justice was fulfilled when the Lord Jesus suffered on the cross for us, but it is because of His grace that we can now find forgiveness.
When we are identified with Christ in His death, in effect we can say we are punished for our sins and Christ absorbed that on our behalf. We are identified with Him and if as a result of identification with Him, we have chosen to live for Him and with Him, we will rise with Him to a new life.
We can then live a life of righteousness by the power of God; and this is what God offers to us in His great wisdom: to those who are the called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God.
We may wonder why the issue of wisdom and power are mentioned here in this way together.
For example in verse 18, we see the apostle Paul put it this way: For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.
Why did not the apostle Paul say, "For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the wisdom of God"? Foolishness should be contrasted with wisdom but instead he said, "...it is the power of God".
But then in verse 24, he says, "...to those who are the called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God".
One of the major reasons why it is put in this way is that "foolishness", as far as the word is concerned, is associated with their concept of weakness. For God to be so weak as to be crucified on the cross, this is foolishness. For Christ to be unable to save Himself and yet to be able to save the world, that is foolishness. Wisdom would mean power, ability to do whatever He wants. There is no need for Him to suffer, so it is foolishness.
But the apostle Paul tells us: "...to us who are being saved it is the power of God". It is in the midst of that foolishness that the power of God is manifested. But what kind of power is that?
It is moral power; it is moral and spiritual power. It is not in the physical realm at that point of time.
Yes, one day the Lord Jesus Christ will come in physical power to reign on this earth. He will come to conquer in the physical realm as King of kings and Lord of lords; but on the cross, He was very weak. He seemed so totally helpless and the people could do what they wanted with Him. They could spit on Him, they could slap Him, they could put a crown of thorns on Him; they could crucify Him.
He was totally weak but it is in that context that the power of God was manifested in its highest degree. The conquest of sin, the conquest of all evil took place at the cross and it is because of that we now have the opportunity to be forgiven, to know the power of God and to live according to the wisdom of God.
We see what affected the Jews and what affected the Gentiles, the Greeks, were these two areas.
The Jews asked for signs because they wanted signs of power; they wanted to have a Saviour who was powerful. The Greeks searched for wisdom: the best way of doing things, according to the wisdom which would also be associated with power. God who is almighty has all the power and the way He does things in wisdom must manifest that power which would not require His suffering because the way of the world is freedom for yourself - others may suffer, but not you.
So as we consider the event of the cross, it is helpful for us to ponder over the meaning of the wisdom of God. It is of a kind that is not usually understood.
We usually think of wisdom as a clever way of doing things but this is not just a clever way of doing things. This is wisdom at its highest level motivated by love, by the desire for what is of the greatest good. God suffered so greatly in order to bring about the greatest good for mankind that He has created.
The apostle Paul expressed this in his own experience in 1 Corinthians 2: 1-5.
1 Corinthians 2: 1-5
- And when I came to you, brethren, I did not come with superiority of speech or of wisdom, proclaiming to you the testimony of God.
- For I determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, and Him crucified.
- I was with you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling,
- and my message and my preaching were not in persuasive words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power,
- so that your faith would not rest on the wisdom of men, but on the power of God.
Paul applied this reality in his own life. From what we know, the apostle Paul was likely to be a man of great intelligence, knowledge and worldly wisdom.
But he said, "...when I came to you, brethren, I did not come with superiority of speech or of wisdom, proclaiming to you the testimony of God". The implication then is that he was capable of that. He was capable of superiority of speech or wisdom but he chose not to do that. He did not proclaim the testimony of God with that kind of wisdom, impressive; as a result of which there were those who said his speech was contemptible, his presence was unimpressive.
If Paul had exercised himself with worldly wisdom, perhaps he might have come across as much more impressive, but he did not. He said, "I determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, and Him crucified". He was absorbed in the person of the Lord Jesus Christ and not the kind of wisdom that can persuade people to follow. And he emphasized: "Jesus Christ, and Him crucified".
The Lord Jesus Christ crucified was not a message that could easily be absorbed and understood: to many people, it would be foolishness; it does not make sense. But to those whose hearts are open, to those who recognized their need, to those who desire to be faithful to God, they would be able to recognize the wisdom of God, the power of God in the message of the cross. Why is that so?
It is because in the message of the cross is a message of the heart, is a message to the heart.
It strikes the heart deep inside us to recognize the issue of sin, the issue of repentance, the issue of forgiveness, the issue of freedom. If we truly love what is good, we will understand this. And those who desire to respond to God will recognize the love of God, the grace of God, and they would be very, very grateful to God. Those who have tasted of God's forgiveness, who find the freedom, those who have come to appreciate the goodness of the Lord, will want to live for Him: there will be a direction. They can be set free.
He said, "I was with you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling": again, the association of weakness and wisdom. The apostle Paul was preaching with the wisdom of God but he was preaching in much weakness: in weakness and in fear and in much trembling. What was that? Why did he not come with such confidence, such superiority of speech and be able to awe people with what he could say?
That was because the apostle Paul knew that unless God was with him, all that he did was useless.
He came in weakness and fear and trembling because he recognized the message was so weighty, so important, so valuable, he must be faithful to God to communicate it effectively; and if he were to depend on his own wisdom, he would destroy it, he would make the cross void, ineffective. He could not afford to do that, so he was with them in weakness and in fear and in much trembling.
That did not mean that the apostle Paul was very afraid of them, that he was afraid that something would happen to him.
His weakness and fear and trembling was associated with his deep concern that he would be faithful to God, that he would communicate in a way that would represent the Lord Jesus Christ correctly, that he would help people in the right way.
And so he said: "...and my message and my preaching were not in persuasive words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power". He was not trying to persuade them with worldly wisdom, with his vast knowledge.
He sought to preach to them by the power of the Spirit, so that there would be a spiritual reality that they could receive and respond to and so he said: "...so that your faith would not rest on the wisdom of men, but on the power of God".
So here again we see the contrast between wisdom and power: not the wisdom of men, but the power of God. The wisdom of God is manifested in spiritual power in this context. The wisdom of men is demonstrated in their own intellectual abilities and in what they may be able to work out in natural power.
2 Corinthians 13: 2-4
- I have previously said when present the second time, and though now absent I say in advance to those who have sinned in the past and to all the rest as well, that if I come again I will not spare anyone,
- since you are seeking for proof of the Christ who speaks in me, and who is not weak toward you, but mighty in you.
- For indeed He was crucified because of weakness, yet He lives because of the power of God. For we also are weak in Him, yet we will live with Him because of the power of God directed toward you.
So again the apostle Paul brings across this aspect of the weakness associated with power.
The Lord Jesus Christ was crucified because of weakness. The Lord Jesus Christ could have destroyed all His enemies instantly. He said He could call upon the Father and He would at once send twelve legions of angels. They could destroy all His enemy but the Lord Jesus did not do that, as result of which He was regarded as being very weak, helpless and He was therefore despised, crucified.
But He lives because of the power of God. So although He was crucified in weakness as far as the eyes of the world were concerned, in the spiritual realm He was manifesting the power of God. For it was at the cross He overcame all the powers of darkness. At the cross He set us free from the condemnation of sin: the power of God was manifested in Him and God raised Him from the dead, and He will come again to manifest the glory of the God in the future in the physical realm as well.
We also must do likewise: For we also are weak in Him, yet we will live with Him because of the power of God... If we learn to be weak in the right way, we will really become strong in Him; we will live with Him because of the power of God.
And so the apostle Paul said: "...for when I am weak, then I am strong".
The wisdom of God is manifested in extreme weakness. It is very difficult to imagine the Creator of the universe, the almighty, all-powerful God coming into this world, being born in a manger and working as a carpenter and despised by people, suffering the temptations by the evil one, rebuked and maligned and laughed at and mocked, punished and crucified.
How can we imagine such a God? It is unimaginable, but the wonderful thing is it is real, it is true! Do we believe it?
If we believe it, let us ponder over the implications of that. We have such a God who is so great, so wonderful, so deep His love, so self-sacrificing. What should be our response to Him?
Why are we still so preoccupied with the things of this world? Why are we still so concerned about what people think of us, what we can get out of the situations of life?
We should be so absorbed in what is in the heart of God, what is important to Him, what He wants to accomplish because what God wants to accomplish arises from His perfect wisdom in the context of His infinite love.
It is as we learn to identify with God, as we learn to love Him and to live for Him that we will appreciate more and more the glory of the wisdom of God, how great and wonderful it is.
And if we live like that, we will then be a true testimony in the world. Men will see the wisdom of God; their hearts will be drawn to Him by His love, His grace; and the message of the gospel will be properly spread by the power of the Spirit of God.
So then, as we come before the Lord, let us ask Him to help us appreciate more deeply His wisdom in the cross.
It is something that we can continue to learn and grow and appreciate for the rest of our lives. The issues are so very deep that we cannot fully fathom but we can marvel more and more at the meaningfulness of it.
Let us ask Him to help us to learn to worship Him and to respond to Him in a manner that is worthy of His calling, that will bring joy to His heart; that we sinful people can bring joy to the heart of the perfect God.
And that is because He has made the provision for us; He has made it possible for us to be transformed to become like Him. We can be united with Him; we can live for Him.
Let us ask Him to help us to respond more deeply to Him and during this time if you find it helpful, specifically tell Him where you have gone wrong, seek His forgiveness and ask Him to help you so that you can live a life that is truly pleasing to Him, that you offer yourself to Him to live for Him fully.